This weekend, my husband attended RCIA for the first time. Bill is coming over tonight so that he and Randy can get to know one another better and work on catching him up to speed. What a grace!
Last night, my husband revealed to me his anxieties about the future, and his feelings of inadequacy because he is unable to fully provide for us. I began to pray for him. During mass this morning, I got the message loud and clear: pray that you can be made new so that you can properly handle the prosperity I desire to pour into you.
Dear God,
I have heard your message to me and to my beloved. How well I know our need to be made new, crafted and fashioned in your image and likeness! Yet I also know that we have within us attachment to sin and wilfulness against obedience which hobbles us and prevents us from freely following you.
Lord, I desire to please you but my own desire for pleasure and comfort blinds my heart to the pains which my selfishness causes you. I am not ready to be made new because my heart is made of stone. So, Father, I do not ask you to give me prosperity, because I am all to o aware of my need to be made new for you. I do not ask you to make me new because my heart is not sincere in desire for this. I ask, instead, that you give me a heart to desire the changes I need to make to become new. I ask you to remove from me the selfishness that blinds me to the pain I cause you with my behavior. I ask you to teach me to be truly, sincerely contrite for my sins. I ask you to help me to clearly see the damage I do when sinning, not only to myself, but to others as well. I love you, Lord, but I do not love you as much as I should. Please change my heart so that I can be ready to be made new.
Love, your daughter,
Brandy
P.S. Please help me to have perfect trust in you.
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